Caution! Girlie Stuff Alert! Read at Your Own Risk!

I know I must be in perimenopause, because my periods only come here and there now. And when they do they're always light. Plus, it turns out people born in March get the earliest onset of menopause. Like, right around age 47. Hey! that's me.

Of course, this happened the very next month after I just bought a big huge deep-discount box of tampons at Sam's. Naturally.

The only thing that really makes them come now is when I go to the acupuncturist. But since it's been many months since I could afford that, I've had hardly any "womanlies" at all.

Until a couple months ago. That one was pretty average.

And again a couple days ago.

But this one came with some oomph to it.

Some bite to it.

I basked in it. That old familiar pain. That heavy she-woman flow.

When I was a teenager we used to call our period our "friend." As in, --My friend is coming. --My friend came last night.

That's just how it feels right now. An old familiar friend. The kind where you already know what the other one's going to do next, and where you can sit together for hours doing this or that and not say a word and still be perfectly comfortable.

Hey. Glad to see you back, friend.