Friday, October 27, 2006

Born Again Virgin

I just found out I've been deflowered not once, but twice in a row, by LL.

Livey told me she blogrolled me. I'm honored.

One fine day I really will learn how to reciprocate, with all you who have honored me. Believe me, I do notice and appreciate it. Baby steps, here.

That was the first LL deflowering.

More sexperiments for LL? nyuk nyuk nyuk!

She DID say she liked it. Maybe that's why she did it again.

See, she, unlike me, is not only not a terrible scaredy-cat technophobe, she's a real for real computer whiz. And on top of THAT, a BLOG whiz.

So...she instantly, skillfully, found my secret button.

My *Make a Donation* button.

Yup. She knew exactly where to go and what to do and how to do it.

I hope to learn, at some point, to make a *wish list* one instead. While I'm certainly cash-poor, I'm also equity-rich, so *donations* don't seem appropriate to me. Besides, I so much prefer to think I'm earning my tips. That's truly different.

Ah! Two lists. One for *fun stuff* like yellow rainlily seeds and such. The other one, for things I need and can't readily get: like my band-aid supply. My Medicare HMO doesn't cover the bandaging supplies. The Silvadene they pay for. The band-aids and gauze rolls and tape to hold it on? No. Jerks.

That's the care package the inimitable Livey has been putting together for me. It was SUPPOSED to be only from *orphaned* supplies, stuff abandoned by the recipient and needing a new home. She actually looked for my button and couldn't find it! She's got a lot of medical knowledge too. But maybe she got a bit misdirected by that hot dog bun thing.

So the *Donation* button has been hanging around, completely Unmentioned but hidden in plain view, since the beginning. Kind of the baby pygmy elephant in the room. Never, ever been hit. And though my sitemeter hasn't been running that long, the blog itself has been here since April 2005. So it held out against all comers for a year and a half.

LL hit it.

It is no longer a Virgin Button.

She seems inordinately proud of herself.

Kind of like this:


Livey said...

Well dammit woman, put that button on the top! Not way down at the bottom!
I was going to do a post asking people to donation on my site and I would buy your supplies and send it to you, but I didn't want you to get pissed at me!

k said...

Well, I'm glad you didn't. That would have troubled me, so thanks for not doing it! If I knew how to fix up that stuff, I would. This is where my phobeness gets all silly. I'm trying, though.

I'll be okay. I really will. I'm all excited to see what I'm getting in the mail from you. Plus with what LL sent, anything else that comes up, I can go get it myself now.

And kmom comes into town on Tuesday, yay!

Livey said...

Dammit my post office closed at 10 today! I forgot they do that on Saturdays. I promise I will put the package in the mail first thing monday morning. I have some room in the box still, was thinking about sending you some toothpaste, lotion, shampoo, any of that stuff you need, I have a ton of it around here. I promise I won't go buy it! LOL

k said...

aHA! Well. Here goes the Allergy Issue.

The good news is, I don't need any of the lotions etc. I stock up very well for lots of reasons. I buy in bulk, like at Sam's, because it's hugely cheaper. I need to always be ready for a hurricane - including the type that only eat feet.

And beyond all that, any product with any scent of any kind is verboten to me. That includes many otherwise innocuous things that simply sat on a shelf at my local Walgreen's, for instance. Why? Because they use so much *air freshener* in there, it poisons every single thing inside the store.

Then, even if I can find products that are truly unscented, I'm still allergic to most or all of them. So, I can't use them.

Now you're seeing one reason I was trying so hard to keep you to only very specific items.

Gauzes and tapes are almost always unscented. Any other kind of cloth? I can only know if it's usable if I *breathe* it first. If it's been washed in any other detergent besides *All Free & Clear,* I can't use it. It doesn't matter how many times I try to wash it - it's simply impossible to get detergent scents out.

So while I'd love to provide a good home for any of the orphaned supplies likes lotions and things? I can't.

Hmmm. I suddenly realized I never actually posted on this before.

pepektheassassin said...

Ummm, I have such a hard time imagining you as very quiet and shy. Why is that?

Livey said...

Oh I understand the allergy thing completely. I have a lot of it too. :(

k said...

ha! Because now I talk talk talk, perhaps?

When I was 6 and living in California, I was much more outgoing. When we moved to a hostile snotty upper middle class Far North Chicago suburb when I was 7, the little assholes in school ripped me to shreds.

When a teacher called on me in class my face would turn beet red and I would slump down in my seat and couldn't answer very well. My one friend? She did the same, except she couldn't answer at all.

Bullied? Yes. Viciously.

I worked very long and very hard to overcome that shyness. It was really incapacitating. I had a hard childhood. Very painful in way too many ways.

When I think back, sometimes I don't understand how I survived it.

People who know me in person today sometimes refuse to believe I was ever quiet or shy. I love to talk to people now, including perfect strangers, and rudely ask them all sorts of personal questions, and generally have a fine old time with it all.

It took a very long time to get there. A lot of work, and thinking, and therapy, and practice, and meds. A lot of living. A lot of listening. Learning.

And underneath it all, in certain ways, I'm still that shy and silent person. Always will be.

k said...

Livey, I wonder so much sometimes about the connections between the different diseases we have. We have a lot of them in common, too.

We both have the fibro and the allergies. Asthma, I'm sure. I never had cancer, thank God. I can't remember if you have regular autoimmune type rheumatoid arthritis. I do wonder if all your old injuries tend to calcify up, as part of that neck thing for instance. Bone spurs, stuff like that. I think that's largely an immune response too?

We're both very strong and healthy underneath our terrible health, if that makes any sense. Great bloodwork. Even for you now.

We both love to work hard physically - even though it's bad for us! Physical labor is almost addicting to me, and has been for a very long time. Yet I'm hearing dribs and drabs of new studies saying that it may actually be permanently damaging for people with fibro to do that.

We both have very high pain thresholds - meaning we can tolerate a lot of pain - but at the same time, we have at least twice the sensitity to pain that normal people do. We're hardwired for it, in our brain responses (per PET scans) and in our aberrant, overabundant neural networks throughout the rest of our bodies.

Since childhood, when the docs test my reflexes, the response is so fast and so strong they often bring in their colleagues to have a look. Is that true for you too?

So. We feel pain twice as bad, yet we can take pain that *normal* people can't.

This is crazy.

Livey said...

Yes, I have a lot of bone spurs in my neck. And my reflexes are the same as yours. I swear you could be my long lost twin! LOL

k said...

Ha! I KNEW it!

k said...

Oh! And gall bladders out.